It's becoming spring in these parts. As wildflowers begin their dance in the wind, I don't seem to keep my eyes on the road very well. Each year I grow to enjoy the changing seasons, but there are still parts of me that grieve the change. Why do I always have to couple grief with everything? It gets heavy. I want to hang on to the past, to the comfortable now. The reason? I'm afraid. As much as I want to be brave, face the world with a smile, seek Him and live new things. I'm scared. Of what? I guess....living. I want to live! I desperately want to. Experience all that God wants for this life, to glorify, worship, adore Him. Grow in gratefulness and love.
My full schedule is piling up all the more. It's just a busy season. I saw it coming. I anticipated it. Look forward to it. I scheduled it. But when it comes down to the doing of it. I feel so small.
I look back at the gifts of this weekend and I am so thankful. A house full of coughing boys healing,
a football tournament taking one boy away,
a birthday party for a precious, thankful girl,
little blue delights waving as I drive past beckoning me to stop and look,
taking photos of a family put together from around the globe,
and a dry cleaner doing a necessary job so well in this little community.
Only Him who sits on the throne could take the so unconnected and weave them into life. The unexpected making life full and I never saw it coming. I'm encouraged. Not quite so afraid. Surprisingly hopeful again. It is good. Grief eases and I think I can see the path ahead to follow Him. I am grateful.
Delicate details of a roadside beauty....
Fading wisteria.....this one blooms this much every five years. Five years of waiting......
Delighted little one, dear to my heart, jumping for joy over a gift.....a gift. Oh that I want to have this coming as a little child to Him rejoicing in His gifts....
Resting from the day's work. Evening light spilling in and it's time to go home. A job well done.
A psalm. For giving thanks.
1 Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.
2 Worship the LORD with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.
3 Know that the LORD is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.