Tuesday, October 14, 2008

A Favorite Verse

"I love you, O LORD, my strength." Psalm 18:1

I'm hanging on to this today. Not feeling particularly strong on this gray, drizzly day. I want to curl up in bed with a good book and escape. I get this way when tasks seem to pile up. The scent of coffee beckons me to grab a blanket and begin. I must resist. =)

My schedule is full with plans for the weekend, mine and my boys'. I sometimes can't seem to see the big picture......."what needs to happen when and how to get the boys there.......and what do I need to pack?" Better "do the next thing" as Elisabeth Elliot encourages. Yet, the "next thing" isn't always clear to me and being a sequential type of person, order wants to dictate the day, my moments. That's when I loose my enjoyment of the day.....I'm the BEST rule follower you can imagine! (Even when there are no rules, per sae.) And, this steals the WONDER in life for me.

I'm beginning to see these things in my life......now, what to do about it? What would it look like to not be so encumbered by the legalism of my heart? I so desire to do "right" that I take my eyes off the One I love and who is my strength and start following the rules while glancing back occasionally to make sure I don't get too far away from Christ. It seems ok to do this in the moment, but this is the very thing that confuses my heart and my mind. I've made the "rules" my master........*sigh*.......and thus, feel weakened by them.

I'm so glad He is my strength. My boot straps broke long ago from picking myself up by them. Unfortunately, I still try to use them from time to time. They just fit so well in my hands. I just continue to forget that I don't need boot straps. I need Christ. I need Him today. I need Him. I don't need the reliance of self to press on and get it done. I need to rest during the busyness of life in His strength. That's when I experience His peace like never before. And I didn't even have to try to make it happen. He pours it out all over me and I'm soaking wet in the peace of Christ! And my little heart is full, happy.......penetrated by His love. It's true....."when I am weak, He is strong."

Lord, may this day be filled with the reminders of Your strength and love. Amen.

He is WONDER-ful~Jules

Monday, October 13, 2008

Game Face

It's Monday and I find myself putting on my "game face" for the week. It will be a short week since my hubbie and I will be headed to St Louis for a homeschool conference we've been invited to. I'm excited to go! Yet, I find myself relying on my strength to dig in a get so much done. I'm afraid I've missed so many moments of WONDER because I "game face" many days. It's a mask really. I gear up and and getter done....that's what life's supposed to be about, right? I'm beginning to wonder.

My hubbie returned from a KAIROS weekend last night. I drove to the maximum security prison to attend the closing ceremony and to spring my man! =) I listened to men share their hearts about the weekend. I heard their stories and I heard my own story many times. It would've been me behind those bars if I had chosen differently. We all would've been wearing white and eating oatmeal masquerading as meatloaf. I'm grateful for weekends like that one where guys have an opportunity to be held by the strong arms of my hubbie and given the chance to sob the hurts away. I love my hubbie's heart and how he loves these forgotten ones. They truly are the "least of these" in our society. These men know what a game face is and how to use it. They have to live behind it to survive. It's a prison within a prison. But, for a few days they can lay it down and get real, if they choose to. Many chose to.

My game face is my prison, too. It masks my insecurities and failures. It reminds me that I'm the only one who can do this thing called life. It appears to be safety and refuge, but it's actually razor wire and guard towers.

I look at my Saviour's life and I don't see a game face. I see compassion, deep emotion, and love. I see a man openly weep in grief and the fire of righteous rebuke in his eyes.....real, deep emotion. I see strong arms gathering up scurrying children and bringing them to His knee. I see real. I see simple love. The life changing kind. I'm not so sure I see that in my life......but, oh, do I want it!

Well, I'm deciding to pull the game face off and lay my self-reliance down today......probably have to do that many times today since my mask is such a great fit and the clothing of self-reliance tailor made for this body! =) I'm ok with that. I'm one of those scurrying children my sweet Saviour will be herding today and I'm ready for the rest of His lap......

Lord, may this day be laced with little joys and praise to You, the mask remover of my soul.

Saturday, October 11, 2008


As I was reading my many tidbits from blogs this morning, I was caught by this word, "wonder." How wonder grabs us, our attention. It takes over the entire body, our thoughts, our perspective. I never really thought about that before. I am sitting in my HAPPY room with it's smiling walls of yellow and I am taken with this WONDER, this new perspective of this emotion, and, I'm grateful. I want to live my life in WONDER. It's part of the main reason I scrapbook. To remember, to live a life of thankfulness spurs me on in my page making. I love taking photos to capture this WONDER, whether it's on the faces of my children or in a sunset nestling in it's place in the rolling hills on the horizon. I especially love finding myself being overwhelmed with it as I pour through the pages of scripture. WONDER is on every page......I just miss it most days due to being consumed with daily tasks of dishes, grocery lists, or just, painfully, myself........Oh, to have WONDER wrap itself around me and turn my chin to the One who thrills my heart with life in this way!

Life is good. Life is wonder. And, I love it.....

Have a wonder filled day~Jules

Friday, October 10, 2008

Love this verse

Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. Prov. 19:20-21

Just read this on another blog I frequent. This is exactly what I'm pondering right now. It's what my heart needed to hear.

I've had many plans the past few days. My home has been painted and I now need to put it all back into order again. I'm EXCITED to put it all back together! I love to organize. However, headaches, a boy's fever and a husband gone has made my many plans halt. Yet, the things of purpose are getting done. The rest is falling into place. Little by little. More will be done tomorrow.........

I am enjoying my freshly painted walls.......I have a HAPPY yellow in my scrapbook room. I bought wood letters to paint the word, 'happy.' That's just what this room makes me. I just sit in that little room and look at the yellow and dream of all the creations to come in this room........can't wait! =)

Hope to share pictures soon~Jules

Sunday, October 5, 2008

A New Day!

Ahh, a place to call cyber home. =) I hope any time you spend here will refresh your spirit and encourage your days. May this little spot on the web be a cozy quilt for the soul.